How to Plan Your Safety When Leaving an Abusive Spouse

Before you start

You deserve to be safe, and trained people can help you plan.

You do not need to do everything at once. Take the steps that feel right for you, at your own pace.

If you are in immediate danger, call the police at 999.

Who can you call?

These organisations offer crisis support, shelter and guidance:

• Police emergency: 999
• WAO (Women’s Aid Organisation): 03-3000 8858 (crisis support, shelter, legal help)
• Talian Kasih: 15999 (24-hour government helpline, social workers, shelter referrals)
• AWAM (All Women’s Action Society): 03-7877 0224

You do not need a plan before you call. They can help you make one.

Keep important documents safe

When it is safe, gather copies of these and keep them where your spouse cannot reach them, such as with a trusted friend or relative, or in a secure online account:

• Your MyKad and passport.
• Your children’s birth certificates and identity documents.
• Your marriage certificate.
• Bank statements and financial records.
• Medical reports or photos of injuries.
• Any police reports.
• Court orders, such as existing protection orders.

If you cannot take originals, photos on your phone are a start. Store them safely or email them to an account only you can open.

Plan where to go

Think about where you could go if you need to leave quickly:

• A trusted relative or friend your spouse does not know well.
• A shelter run by WAO or another organisation. WAO can arrange emergency shelter through its hotline at 03-3000 8858.
• A hotel or other short stay, if you have money for it.

If you have children, plan for them too. Pack a small bag with clothes, medicine and a comfort item.

Protect your finances

If you can, set aside some money in a separate account or a safe place. It can cover transport, a place to stay and food at first.

Note down what you know about your spouse’s money: bank accounts, property and income. This helps later with maintenance and property division.

If you qualify for legal aid, your legal costs may be covered. WAO and the Legal Aid Department can help you apply.

Stay safe with your phone and computer

Your phone, email and social media may be monitored. Consider:

• Using a phone your spouse cannot access for sensitive calls and messages.
• Clearing your browser history after visiting pages like this one.
• Using private or incognito browsing.
• Changing passwords only from a safe device.

If you are reading this on a shared device, you can close this page and call WAO at 03-3000 8858 or Talian Kasih at 15999 instead.

Legal protection is available

A protection order under the Domestic Violence Act 1994 can stop your spouse from contacting you, entering your home or coming near you and your children. You can apply through the police or directly at the court.

You can get one before, during or without divorce proceedings. A lawyer, WAO or the Legal Aid Department can help you apply.

Take one step at a time

You do not need to do everything today. When you are ready, reach out to someone you trust or call one of the helplines above.

Looking to engage a divorce lawyer? When you are safe and ready to think about divorce, custody or maintenance, you can request independent lawyer contact via WhatsApp: Request Lawyer Contact. For general information, use our guides and tools.